Moments!

As I approach the wonderful age of sixty the questions I ask myself are very different than even a few years ago. I am not concerning with what I have or don’t have but my concerns are more about who I have or don’t have. The question I ask daily and even sometimes hourly is, “what moments are being created that will be worth taking about after I am gone”? Gone is a heck of a closer now than when I was a punk 30 year old! When I look at my family as the days rush by I wonder if I am spending the kind of time with them that truly matters. I find very little satisfaction in the things I do anymore as I consider what I am becoming rather than what I am accomplishing. The ministry like all jealous lovers desires much more than one should ever give and to maintain balance (whatever that is) becomes what’s most desired of me. Moments are the one thing I consider as I make my next choice. What will my family remember but more importantly what will my God remember in the moments I have created? 

 

Fathers!

I think within the walls of the church fathers hear more about what they need to do rather than simply being praised for what they are already doing. Don’t get me wrong there is always room for improvement however dads need to know the things they are doing right. I know most guys find their identity and significance in doing (task) not being (relationships) but I think we need to remind dads just how great they and capitalize on those wonderful attributes. Our sons and daughters need to hear others speak well of their dads not remind them how much more they need to do but not how much more they need to be. Show me first by your example what father is and then you will have the right to tell what a father does. I just want to say to all of us who have failed on many occasions to be the perfect father to our children, “well done for the right things you have accomplished”!  I do what’s right when reminded of the things I have done right!

 

So busy!

Every guy I talk to is always telling me how busy they are. What is busy anyway? Why are we so busy? What are the things that have brought men to this crazy frenzy called busy? I mean isn’t busy totally different than productive? It seems to me that one is out of control and the other is in control. I think we as guys like to say we are busier than we really are. We like to talk about what we do not what we are becoming. Busy keeps you from what is truly important! Busy is guilt driven not purpose or passion driven. Busy drives us but seldom leads us. Wow are we busy… the devil loves to keep men busy so they never TAKE the time to discover productive. We have filled our calendars but our lives are so empty. Busy…how’s that working for ya?

 

The call!

The call! What does it mean to have passion for anything? I mean I hear all the time that we as Christian men are to have passion for the Lord, for worship, for serving in the church and of course for our families. Sometimes I wonder why few are asking what we have passion for? What is the thing or should I say calling that we feel called to? What is the one thing that God put in our hearts not man? I have spent a lot of time asking men around the country what are they passion about and when the question is asked I get this deer in headlights response! Isn’t the call of God placed at a higher level of responsibility than the call of man? Doesn’t the voice of the Father need to be heard over the voice of man? No wonder guys are so used up rather than built up! We obey man more than we obey the Father who promised His burden is light. But when one doesn’t know their call they will spend their life knowing the cover-up! Too many men live in quiet desperation.   

 

The call!

than the call of man? Doesn’t the voice of the Father need to be heard over the voice of man? No wonder guys are so used up rather than built up! We obey What does it mean to have passion for anything? I mean I hear all the time that we as Christian men are to have passion for the Lord, for worship, for serving in the church and of course for our families. Sometimes I wonder why few are asking what we have passion for? What is the thing or should I say calling that we feel called to? What did God put in our hearts? I have spent a lot of time asking men around the country what are they passion about and when the question is asked I get this deer in headlights response! Isn’t the call of God placed at a higher level of responsibility man more than we obey the Father who promised His burden is light. But when one doesn’t know their call they will spend their life knowing the cover-up! 

 

Bye!

So are freaking out when it comes to just getting away. Maybe you have put yourself on some quilt trip or maybe the demands have become your security blanket for the need to please. Whatever is keeping you from saying bye to all that life requires one thing is clear… you need a getaway in the worst way. I have just returned from Mancation 2010 which is our men’s getaway. All the guys who went had one thing in common. It wasn’t easy getting there! There were lots of excuses but no reasons for taking time out of life to live. How can men hear the Fathers voice with so much noise around them? How can they possibly know the game plan without ever going to the sideline? No noise, no demands, no tugs just a lot of silence broken occasionally by the wind in the trees and the voice of the Father. I admit that “me time” is something that I need but feel guilty in taking. There is always something to do but little time to stop and learn how to be. Only recreation can produce recreation that allows a man to find why he is here! Bye…

 

Risky!

I love to take risk and to tempt failure on regular bases. I never feel fully alive unless the possibility of failing is knocking at my hearts door. I know this is true because I have failed more than I have succeeded. The Christian life was never meant to be lived with a man made safety net just beneath us. I am not saying that we simply abandon all reasoning or we come up with some plan and ask God to bless it. But what I am saying is to be willing to allow God to speak to you and even if it is not comfortable you would still be willing to take the first step. The willingness is the first step. We want the presents of God but with conditions! We want God to have His way in our way. We want God to move but we will dictate the direction! The time has come for men of God to become fearless in the faith and stop sanitizing the sacred! Stop telling God how free we are within the prisons of our own comfort ability. Do we truly want all that God has to offer or do we want what makes since to us? God is all about the risk not the resort!                            

 

Loving it!

Man has it been awhile since I have blog. Can you tell that blogging is not one of my passions? It reminds me of spending time with God. You start missing one day with the Father and before you know 3 weeks have gone by. I must say I miss Him more than I miss this!

Anyway I am writing this from our nation’s capital in fact when I look out my hotel room window I can see the Washington monument. I am here speaking at the American Association of Orthodontics convention. I love speaking and I love the fact that I am allowed the awesome opportunity to live out my God given calling. Few men even know what they are called to do let alone live it every day of their lives. I hurt deeply for men who are still trying figure out why they are on the planet and what truly brings joy and a since of purpose and significance to their lives. Like Moses in the desert men wander not wonder for years when their promise land is within them. My great joy is when I see men discover their passion/calling and watch them become the pirates seeking for the lost treasure of the souls. What an adventure what a risk what a way to be fully alive. I am loving it are you

 

Good fear!

We hear a lot about bad fear but what about the good fear? You know the fear you learn when you are a little kid when you accidently touch a hot stove or when I was a kid when I disrespected mama in front of dad? I learned the fear of the back of my dad’s hand.  I know that perfect love cast out all fear however I wonder what that really means. Isn’t God to be feared; in fact doesn’t fear make us do the right thing at times like slow down when we see a cop? That isn’t all bad! I know I have a healthy fear of my wife and the fear of dying helps me not be an idiot. I think that we do not have enough fear sometimes because we live our lives without the since of desperation or motivation to live life at a whole level. Fear is a wonderful motivator for to face fear or to overcome it we must take risk and live out of our comfort zone. The Bible says the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom so the opposite must true as well, the beginning of stupid is no fear of the Lord! It is true that perfect love cast out all the bad fear but I know it leaves all the good fear as well. Don’t be stupid be afraid!  

 

Rain!

It seems like the rain in Sacramento will never stop! Even as I write this blog I can hear the wind blowing and the rain hitting the windows. It feels more Seattle, WA than Sacramento, CA. and it is the middle of April. I know the old rhyme April showers will bring May flowers but I am tire of the rain, I am tired of the cold and I am tired of seldom seeing the sunshine! However I do have to admit that my yard has never looked greener the air has never been cleaner and the house has never been cozier. Rain is like my life… with every new storm comes with it the good and the bad lessons learned and character developed. I get really tired of the storms of life but without them there would be no growth no freshness and no appreciation of the sunny days. Rain has a way of washing the earth with one great shower and there is nothing like the feeling of taking in the fragrance right after a rain storm. The feeling is much the same after a good cry or seeing God come through one more time.  We all need the rain storms in our lives and yet we all get tired of the long seasons of those storms.  I just looked at the forecast and they are predicting sunshine for the next couple of days. I believe that is Gods prediction for my life as well. I can handle the rain storm if I know there are sunny days ahead! Enjoy the rain for the Son is coming!

 

Tithing!

There are a few things in life that just doesn’t make a whole lot of since like giving money that you just don’t have. We are trying to teach our 17 year old daughter about tithing and that you always give God the first fruits of your pay check (gross) not the net. We told her that the tithe comes from your need and that your offering comes from your abundance. The Last Sunday the Lord convicted me to give beyond my tithe and to trust Him so I did. When I went to pay my bills well let’s just say I was a bit short. I had to set aside a large amount of money for an unexpected tax bill which set me way back financially. Later that day my wife walked into my office and told me that there was a mistake on the taxes and we could keep the money we had set aside. That tax money was 100 fold of my tithe! BTW fifty dollars literally blew in front us on the sideway that evening apparently that was Gods tip! My daughter just wrote her first tithe check.

 

When?

My wife has always played a big role in my life especially when it comes to never giving up. She is tenacious in her pursuit of the dreams and visions that God has put in her heart. Recently the Z family took a road trip down to LA. NBC is casting for their new reality show called, “The Best Restaurant Idea”! Cherisse has had an idea for a restaurant for over the past 10 years but put it on the shelf to take care of our daughter and yours truly. Anyway we all headed down to LA to pitch our idea and maybe be picked to appear on the show. You guessed it… we made it through 2 rounds and now we are waiting to see if we are going to be one of the finalists. Now for all you Christian unbelievers it truly doesn’t matter if we make it or not. The go for it attitude was worth it all. The family doing something together was worth it all. Not waiting for the perfect opportunity was worth it all. We have already won because we did it!

 

Burnout!

So Martha invites Jesus to dinner and then gets so busy preparing dinner that she forgets that Jesus is even in her house. This is the craziness of getting so busy doing things for Jesus (ministry) that we forget the real purpose of why we are doing what we are doing. I have noticed men burnout on doing stuff for Jesus because they forgot to do them in Jesus. We will go to the mission field for Jesus but seldom read the Bible in Jesus. We will work around the church for Jesus but seldom attend church with our families in Jesus. Jesus doesn’t need us to do anything for Him because He is capable of doing things for Himself. He doesn’t need our help doing stuff for Him which can be done without even knowing Him. However He does want us to do things in Him which means my priority is to know Him and then to serve Him. I don’t work in His house without setting at His feet listening to His word. I don’t get so busy doing things for Him that I forget to listen to Him! Jesus said many will say look what I did for you and He will say…but I never knew you. I have never burnout on knowing Him.

 

Alone!

The Bible says, “Come let us reason says the Lord”! I find myself wanting to spend more time by myself these days. Not that I have little desire to be with the ones I love but I need to hear another voice other than those around me. Alone is so different that lonely because to be alone means I can hear the voice of God but to be lonely means I can only hear the voice of pity and self interest. One voice takes through the valley to the mountain top where the other voice takes me from the mountain top to the valley but seldom through it! I need to be alone but I never need to be lonely. Alone means you are away from the people however lonely means the people are away from you. I must leave my crowded life and slept away to just be with my Father. It might just be for a moment a few minutes when I turn off the world to turn on the His word! I want to no other voice but His. God never raises His voice so we must be silent to hear Him. Go ahead Lord I am listing.

 

No!

What is the difference between being busy and being productive? As I race through what is left of my life I am reminded that the Bible says,” our life is like a vapor”! I guess that means very quick with few stops along the way. I believe the main difference between busy and productive is found in one word…intentional! I simply choose to make my life matter even if it means making a few people mad along the way. The ability to be intentional is to have the courage and I mean courage to say NO and to set priorities with the wisdom of ridged flexibility. The key as a man is to know when and more importantly who to say no to. If I live intentional someone at any given moment will be disappointed with my ability to say NO. As I say yes to God He teaches me who to say NO to starting with me!

 

 

 

Buzzed!

Buzz Oates was in the cave last night sharing the life of an 86 year old man and a journey that could easily become a major motion picture. If I were to give the film a title it would be, “How to Get the Buzz On”! From mowing lawns for 25 cents per yard (push mower) to near death experiences during WW2 as a bombardier to becoming one of the leading businessmen in the nation Buzz Oates typifies what it is to have a dream and never look back. During his presentation on three different occasions through watered eyes this millionaire several times over said,” This most important decision he or any man can make is to give their life to Jesus Christ”!  He went on to say that he has had failures but Jesus Christ has always been faithful. He refereed to Jesus as his best friend. I guess I walked away knowing what has real value a true significance. Buzz did not write me a big fat check but he did make a huge deposit in my life. I am truly Buzzed!

 

 

 

Marriages!

Over The last 4 weeks Cherisse and I have been teaching a marriage class at Sunset Christian Center. Our  focus has been The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman. Many guys said they have the book but never really have taken the time to read it. Wow is that the story of men’s lives… I have something that will change my marriage but I just haven’t taken the time to use it. It seems like every time Cherisse and I decide to teach a class on marriage ours comes under attack. Now I am not sure attack is the right word  maybe the proper word would be test as in do you have your act together? I love Cherisse with all my heart and I know she loves me but we defiantly do not speak the same language. Sometimes I feel like we are from two different countries try to be missionary’s to one another. We both have some life changing truth but we just don’t have the right language. After 20 years of marriage I think I have learned two words…forgive me!

 

Confessions!

The Bible says, “Confess your sins one to another so that you may be healed”. We men have a difficult time with the whole thing of confession. I mean what are we to confess and to who? Many times the sins that are the deepest the ones that bring to us the greatest shame and fear are the last ones we are going to confess to anyone. What about the fall out of our confession what about dealing with the ramification of the sin confessed? Will people treat us differently with their new found information? The great lie of the enemy is to get men to be more concerned with their outcome than their freedom. Confessed sin is about healing not pleasure it is about freedom not reputation it is about becoming a man of God not maintaining a hidden agenda. These are the end of days for I believe the return of the Savior is very near. Now is the time for all men to come clean and to be honest with who they are and who God wants them to be. I have felt the pain of confession but I also have seen the gain of confession. Confession to God brings forgiveness confession to man brings healing.  So confess!

 

Thank you!

I just want to take a moment and say a huge thank you to all of my volunteers that give themselves to the cave week in and week out. All of you are such a blessing to my life and the cave simply would not happen without you. You all have jobs you all have families and you all do not have the time to do what you do. However you choose to do something that the other 80% have failed to do…sacrifice! You arrive early and many times are the last to leave the gym. You never complain and have this, “whatever it takes” attitude to get the job done. And you do it all for one outcome that a man might experience the life transforming message of Jesus Christ. To my precious brothers  thank you from the bottom of my heart! We set up the cave to tear down satins’ kingdom!!!

                                                                                                                              

 

Attitude!

There are a lot of things that happen in my life that I absolutely have no control over such as my hair loss, how tall am not, my waste size ok forget the waste! Let’s face it life has a way of sometimes just slapping us silly. We are all one phone call away from a life altering situation good or bad. The days we are now living in are days of uncertainly and for many men the fear of a loss job, kids freaking out, unplanned illness and no retirement brings stress and sometimes crazy choices. Guys are just plan tired of all the demands and feeling like is this all worth it? I am the first to admit that my attitude is determined by what is happening around me rather than who is happening in me. I choose to let life determine my attitude rather than letting the life giver Jesus Christ so invade me so encompass me that the “who happenings” are more significant that what happens. Not to sound too religious but I need to be so in love with Jesus that His who overtakes my what! I can choose my attitude when I submit to His authority. Attitude is all about perspective how we see ourselves and others. My attitude changes when it is more about how He sees things not how I see them. Jesus let me see what you see moment by moment!

 

Rejections!

Last night my wife and I went out to dinner in downtown Sacramento. After dinner we decided to go look for the perfect desert and came upon a place that made chocolate crepes…oh ya!  When I got out of the car I saw a homeless person asleep on the cold concrete with nothing more than a thin jacket to cover the person’s legs. It was one of those moments that we all have when it comes to the homeless, do I do something or not? I decided to keep walking (stop judging me) but I couldn’t get the person out of my mind. After desert (awesome) we made our way back to the car. The person was still lying there so I decided to give them a small blanket I had in my car. As I walked to give the blanket the person woke up and to my amazement it was a young woman. I asked her if I could give here the blanket and she said she was fine! But she wasn’t fine she was cold and homeless. Her pride or mental state would not allow her to receive the perfect gift on a cold winter’s night. I had what she needed but she had what she didn’t need… a cold heart or messed up mind on a cold night. I guess I know how Jesus feels when it comes to giving to me at times!

 

Freedom!

Men live their life in layers! We know how to let people get as close to us as we deem necessary. The walls that we have carefully constructed from layers of hurt, pain, fear, failure and rejection will one day serve as the same walls of our inner personal prison. Few if any have the awesome privilege to walk into a man’s person cell of hidden passion, dreams and visions. Men make the walls even thicker by dwelling on what they don’t have rather than being grateful and thankful for what they have been blessed with. Guys live in a quiet desperation that is shield with performance based acceptance. The walls serve only one purpose and that is to keep every man from discovering his God given passion/calling and thereby never becoming fully alive and significant. The only person that holds the keys to man’s inner cell is Jesus Christ the Lord! He sets the captive free, He unlocks everyman’s potential, He alone has the power to restore the lost years due to fear and isolation. The great exchange…His life for yours! His keys for your freedom!

Rejoice!

The definition of rejoice is to be happy or to make someone else happy. Happy seems so shallow to me at times and it changes like the weather in Denver. I believe happiness is based on what while joy is based on whom. The Bible says, “Rejoice” not re-happy! I am happy when the what is in my favor and what makes me happy is performing well. I am happy but I do not have joy! Joy is a result of “who” God is in my life while happy is a result in the “what” to my life. As a Christian man I am to rejoice in the Lord not to re-happy in the Lord. Joy is the person in my life while happy is the performance of my life. My joy may bring me happiness but my happiness will never bring me joy. Nothing can bring me the joy of the Lord but the Lord of my joy. I am a man of consistency when I rejoice in the Lord not seek a temporary happiness through life’s performances. I can praise God as a result of joy not happy. Today I choose to rejoice not just to be happy! Happy is the desert!

 

 

 

 

Road trips!

For those of you who follow my blog I am sure you have noticed it has been a couple of days since my last entry. I was asked to speak to the California Republican Assembly in Los Angeles over the weekend so the Z family decided to make a road trip out of it. I love road trips because it always gives me a few life tips along the way. One of the life tips when taking a road trip is to try to leave the laptop turned off and give your focus to the family not work. Even though it is sometimes difficult turning something off in order to turn something on is well worth the effort. Another life tip I learned was to try to take more road trips! You learn a lot about the people you love when traveling in a car for more than 8 hours like the need to use the bathroom when there isn’t any for miles. I guess the thing that made this trip special is that the next Zelesky road trip will be taking my little girl to Tennessee to go to college. What a life tip that will be!

 

Productivity!

My days fly by and with every passing minute I continue to ask myself one question where did that minute go? Men want to know if they are producing anything that has any significance. We live to do and what we do is very important to who we are. At the end of the day we want to know that in some small way we mattered! In our false humility we do not want the recognition however we do want the reward of knowing that we are not invisible. Productive is different than busy. Busy is simply doing a whole bunch of stuff that is somewhat out of control it is letting the day control us. Productive is being intentional with the stuff that we have to do and we take charge of the day and our life. Jesus was never busy but always productive. He knew when to DO and He knew how to walk away and BE. I believe the greatest productivity is doing nothing but setting at His feet and learning how to BE not DO! After all we are human Beings not human Doings…

 

Little things!

I woke up this morning and tucked away inside of my laptop was a sticky note. Someone knew my life well enough to know that I would be sure to find it there. Someone took the time out of the craziness of their life to think about mine. Someone gave me one of those “little things”! I mean it was just a few lines on a sticky note nothing huge nothing that took a lot of time or money. It was a moment of sweet surprise that touched me and moved me and gave me what I needed… acknowledgement. It is always the little things that cause big things to matter. Sometimes the little thing can cause the heart to break and and over a period of time the marriage to breakup. And sometimes it is the little things that can cause a heart to find healing and warmth and the courage to say I forgive you. Today I received my little thing and all it said was, “you’re a great dad! Love ya pops xoxox Nicole”! She changes my big world with her little things. Thanks sweetie!

 

Sunday mornings!

I have heard it said that the devil works overtime on Sunday mornings. More fights between husbands and wives seem to happen on Sunday mornings. The kids fighting with parents, parents trying to get the kids dressed and to church on time… ya right. Tons of hassle for an hour and half of holiness. The question has to be asked is it all worth it? The answer is found in the reason we attend. Church can never be about us or simply our needs or what we might or might not get out of it. Going to church is all about Jesus and what we can offer to Him and then it is all about the people and what we have to offer to them. We are last! There is no need in a man’s life greater than the need to go to church and learn how to die to self. Sunday mornings is the true text of every man’s heart and what is most important to him. Sunday mornings is about a man’s heart and if God still has full control of it. See ya at church!

 

 

The power of nothingness!

At the core of every man is the drive to do something. Men find their significance in what they do not in who they are. Most men are not relational beings they are hunters and gathers. We like the thrill of the chase but not getting caught. We love to talk about what we do but not what we dream of doing. The problems of our lives not the passions of our lives become the topic of guy conversations. Men are scared of silence and the sound of their own heartbeat.  Men want noise that will drown out the voice of God speaking of what could be and not settling for what is. The power of doing nothing is the fuel that will ignite your passion and purpose. Cars were made to be driven but men were created to dream. Find a place of silence and nothingness and you will hear the voice of God the author of your passion!

 

The best of days!

What is the difference between the best of days and the worst of days? The Bible says,” this is the day that the Lord has made let us rejoice and be glad in it”! God ask us to rejoice in the day not in the week or in the year. Rejoicing is a day by day exercise not a week by week or a month by month or God forbids a year by year.  A man cannot handle thinking beyond the day! We project so far ahead that it robs us of the best of days. We must plan our future while we rejoice in THE DAY. This is your best day because Jesus is in it and He wants you to be in it as well.  Faith is what you hope but for many guys fear is what they plan out. The is your best day not because of what will happen to you but what God will do through you. Rejoice in the Lord of the day and you will be glad in it. Think of who He is not who you’re not or for some of you think of who He is not who you think you are.  This is your best day because Jesus is the Lord of it!

 

 

Domestic Christi any!

I believe we as men have been domesticated into believing that we must live our lives within the lines that others have set up as a result of their own personal fears. We tame what we fear might cause us harm or discomfort or what we have become jealous of because we want to be like them at some level. Me are to be wild and untamed not leached and controlled. I am not saying that wild equals neglect or some lack of personal responsibility in fact quit the opposite. Untamed men are the real caretakers of their families because they live by the laws of God not the traditions of man. They dare to trust a God which allows them the freedom to explore their God given passions rather than just work some dead end job for the rest of their lives.  Wild men make the best fathers and husbands because they love Jesus more than anything thing else on the planet and have learned the power of surrender not survival. Born to be wild!  

 

 

Meetings that matter!

I hate meetings or should I say I hate meetings that don’t matter or should I say I hate meetings that don’t matter to me. I like meetings that are short and sweet that is why I don’t make a very good counselor. My ADD kicks in with anything that has to do with administration even though if need these people to keep me from going to jail. I love meetings that have to do with vision casting or when someone is sharing their passion for life. Whining or grip sessions drive me crazy or someone who just wants to hear themselves talk. I know meetings are a necessary evil and that some are even somewhat productive. I just wish I did have to go to them. I love meetings that I call but the ones that are calling me. I need to have a better attitude when it comes to meetings. Maybe the way I go into one would make a difference in the way I come out of one! Gotta run I am late for my next meeting.

 

Time out!

I know it has been a few days since I have blogged however my wife and I took a few days off just to get away. Sometimes you need to get away so you know what you really need to get to! The laptop stayed behind along with every work related issue and my focus was getting to know my bride of almost 20 years. We men love to take time off only to bring the thing we are taking time off from with us during our time off. Call me crazy but isn’t that like standing in a prison cell telling others how free you are? Time outs must be taken for they are seldom given! 48 hours until the cave…

 

 

 

Out of reach!

I remember as a child always wanting something that was just out of my reach. In fact if I was truly honest that is how I have lived most of my life reaching for what others say is impossible but to me it makes perfect since. The passion that God has put within the heart of every man must always be just out of mans reach for if it was within his reach he simply wouldn’t need God. As a child if I couldn’t reach my desire I would find something bigger that would extend my reach. As a man that something extra is God! Boring is making your life and everything in it totally reachable by your ability. But you were created to dream God size dreams and then allow God to become the true extension of your life to make them your reality. Many a man believes in God but few put God to the test by trusting in Him. I am not talking about being stupid or foolish with our lives but I am talking about defining, discovering and deploying the passion that is in your heart but seems just beyond your reach. Passion is within Gods reach!

 

send asap!

Men of the Cave,

 

Just a quick shout out to get to the cave tonight! Man Cave welcomes back Pastor Greg Farrington along with adventurous Rick Massey. You won’t want to miss this life changing experience.

 

See you tonight,

 

Pastor Z

Cave day!

In a few short hours the gym at Sunset Christian Center will be transformed into a hospital for men who are broken and hurting. This isn’t just a church with a steeple but a battle ground that fights for the hearts of fathers, sons, brothers, uncles and friends. A small army of men show up every Wednesday night to help set up and tear down the Man Cave. They are thanked by the lives that are transformed including their own. They are angles that look like men! Thank you from the bottom of my heart. Cave day is what I am all about and I find great pleasure in knowing that God by His mercy and grace has allowed me the opportunity to play my small part in this move of God with in the hearts of men. The cave is too crowed for egos or political correctness but there is plenty of room for humility and honesty. Come as you are but leave as God has always wanted you to be. It is cave day and I would not have it any other way! See you tonight. 

 

Wasted times!

Yesterday my wife, daughter, her boyfriend and me drove to Napa to get a hamburger.  We drove all the way there got a burger and turned around and drove all the way home. Was the drive worth the hamburger oh ya (Taylor’s rocks) but just being together made the trip worth the time many would say was wasted. No one will ever give you the time to invest in what is most important so you have to take it. You have to take the time and live with absolute intention. Turn off the TV, take a walk with the wife, text I love you to your kids, leave your laptop at work, and come to the cave… live with intention. Wasted time is time spent thinking about what you should have done rather on what you can do right now. Btw get the blue cheese burger it’s off the hook! The Man Cave tomorrow night.

 

Something Different!

If you want something different you have to do something different. Yesterday was my something different day! I was afforded the wonderful opportunity to preach at Sunset Christian Center by Pastor Greg. This is something that I take very seriously and with much prayer and thought. I am more of an evangelist than a pastor and God asked me to step out of my comfort zone into the bold zone! At the end of the service I asked people to come forward to except Jesus Christ as their savior. This was a bold move on my part and their part and as a result God did His part. This may never happen again for we are never to put God in a box or make a move of God something we worship. However we are all to expect God to take us out of what is comfortable into what is confronting. Men must go where God is taking them to be fully alive! 

 

Valentine's Day!

Cherisse and I have had the opportunity to host several marriage retreats over the years and we have come to one simple conclusion. We call it, “The Number Factor”! If you spouse doesn’t just know they are number one but feels it as well your marriage is slowly decaying and you have become two people that stay together for the sake of the children or for the security of finances. Nothing takes priority over your spouse no one and nothing! Jesus is not number one in your marriage.  Jesus is not a number He is the creator and because of Him the marriage priority has be established. He is not just part of the priority He alone establishes it. He is not a number in your marriage but He is the nature of your marriage. Make Him all and then you will have the power to make each other number one. Are you number one?

 

Keep it real!

The mission statement of the cave is simple (just the way guys like it) “The Man Cave is a safe place for a dangerous message”. What we mean by that is the message will go as deep as a man will let it.  If a man feels that what is being said or who is saying it lacks authenticity he won’t feel safe and the message becomes useless. We must live beyond our words. We first and foremost must keep it real if we are to have our reality messed with. God can handle your reality not your hypocrisy! The cave is where we bring who we really are to Jesus and who He really is changes who we really are. God accepts every mans reality but loves you so much that He wants His reality to become more real than yours. Bottom line…decrease and He will increase!

 

 

 

Just Jesus!

Most men are just plan tired. They are tired of their job, tired of the bills, tired of relationships, tired of trying to figure everything out. They go to bed tired wake up tired and feel tired most of the day and for many guys they are tired of church, God and everything that is associated with it. They do what they hate most of their lives only to try to save enough money so at the end of their lives they can re-tire… But then there is Jesus! Not the rules and regulations just Jesus. Not how much can you get done today but just Jesus. Not trying to find your identity in what you do but just Jesus. Not busy going to or staying away from but just the living water Jesus. When was the last time it was just you and Jesus? In Him is the place of rest. Just Jesus!

 

Man's ideas!

If God were not to show up at the Man Cave, how much of what we have manufactured in our services could go on smoothly without Him? How big affect does the presents of an almighty God really matter in the “Order of Service”? Could we worship without His presents, could we preach without His presents, could lives still be changed without His presents? It is His house we are His guest therefore He ask us to participate in what He is doing it is not for us to invite Him to participate in what we are doing! Is it possible that we are more comfortable with man’s ideas in God’s house than God’s ideas in His own house? The fabrication of the presents of God leads to hearing the voice of man not the voice of God. We need a move of God not simply the ideas of man!

 

 

 

Self righteousness!

Judgment by appearance is one of the greater sins within the Body of Christ.  The sins of smoking and drinking are easily condemned however the greater sins of judging and condemning has become accepted and at some levels embraced. If one does not have a place of brokenness in their lives as a reference of who they really are they will become self righteous and judge with little accuracy the lives of others. The thought that one life has greater value than another has made the church the most segregated place to visit every Sunday morning. Knowing who you really are without the blood of Jesus gives you the grace to accept who God accepts and to get the 2x4 out of your own eye. We never judge with accuracy. 

 

The super boys super bowl!

There are moments in a man’s life that are just plan magic. Those moments that allow men to be men without the thought of where’s the next buck coming from, who’s mad at you now and what needs to be fixed. A few hours where you laugh real loud, test the “thin skin” monitor and yell at the TV! You only have to walk a few feet to a spread that represents the worst of all the food groups. Thank you Cherisse for making sure the boys were well taken care of. I was sad to see the last guy leave but happy that they all came. Until next year my friends it was the best of times!

Home videos!

Last night the Z family watched some old home videos mostly of my daughter growing up. 17 years that were capture frame by frame of moments forgotten by the business of life. We have lived in the same house for the last 14 years and seeing the changes not just in the house but in me were somewhat scary. The Bible says that we are like a vapor here today and gone tomorrow and that reality rings true as I watched my life fly by frame by frame. It makes me want to live with more intention on what I love to do not just what I have to do. To me it is not about getting my priorities in place but getting my passion in place. The videos were not about moments of responsibility but moments of passionate relationships!

What do men dream about?

It was once said that most men live in a quiet desperation! We have learned to simply not voice the things that burn in our hearts to do. In the craziness of responsibility we have given up on the dreams of our youth. In our silence we have become bitter and even sometimes angry as we look to heaven and ask,” is there more to me than this”? In our silence we have learned to play the game and seek out what others have defined us to be and do. A man who surrenders his heart to Jesus Christ is a man that becomes defined by his creator not by the creation. Old men dream dreams!

Delight in God!

When a man’s heart is burning with the desire to know Jesus not simply to become some domesticated Christian believer he will find the freedom to discover and deploy his God given passion. We are not to be tamed by the doctrine of man based on fear and tradition but we are to find the path that is completely unique to us and maybe a threat to others. A man’s life must be fueled by passion…a passion for God and a passion for others. We are not to live foolish but we are to live passionate in faith not fear. Discover your passion and live your destiny!

Owning the cave!

Many times the absence of a leader allows others to take ownership and move them from being a spectator to a participator. I really missed being at the cave last night however the cave is not Pastor Z the cave is every man. The cave is not the home of Pastor Z and you are allowed to visit but the cave is Gods and He invites all of us to take ownership at some level. I have heard nothing but positive feedback about last night and a special shout out goes to Pastor Mike Green for stepping it up! Love you guys. The cave in just 6 days!

Hidden weaknesses!

Men who appear the strongest, capable, self-made, outgoing, secure and holy on the outside many times are the weakest, scared and phony on the inside. Many men are like the back lot of Universal Studios where the buildings appear to be real but all you have to do is open one of the doors to discover what you see is not what you get. We are taught from a young age that men don’t cry or show any type of emotion excepted at sporting events. What a lie. Jesus was and is a man’s man and yet wept openly over his friend Lazarus. Our greatest weakness is our phony strength! Get from the coach to the cave tomorrow night where men are real!

To whom much is given!

I never thought in a million years that I would serve as a pastor again. However what man says no to God says yes to! I can think of so many others that would do a much better job than I. Yet in God’s since of humor He chooses me to lead the cave during this season of my life. Leadership is more than an appointment it is a calling and the responsibility can sometimes be a bit overwhelming. My actions must speak louder than my words and awareness of others becomes more valuable than accomplishments of self. Full time ministry is not a paycheck but a life check as you must be willing to live above reproach. Is this not the call of every Christian man? The cave in just two days!

The power of narrow!

Life can get crazy from day to day as I try to make since of Gods priorities. I no longer have a desire to live large and shallow but I want to live deep and narrow. The power of a river is not how big it looks but how deep in flows. The depth of a river like our lives is not in the expansion of its banks but in the narrowing. Rivers likes men’s lives can look big and impressive on the outside but shallow with closer inspection. Shallow is great for canoes but not for large ships caring precious cargo. I am impressed with what men can carry not what carries a man! What do you carry?

Owning your beliefs!

My daughter is a senior in high school and will be heading off to college this fall. She is at that terrifying place in life and so are her parents where she is deciding for herself what she truly believes. For 17 years we have told her what to believe and have tried to live those beliefs in front of her. She has seen firsthand the hypocrisy with in so many so-called believers even those in leadership that sometimes it becomes difficult for her to understand Christianity. I reminded her of her own hypocrisy and mine and that my belief is in Jesus not His kids!

All I can say is WOW

All I can say is WOW! Last night in the cave was simply unbelievable or should I say very believable. Over 200 men were in attendance and the presents of God was everywhere. I want to personally thank every guy who invited a guest to be with them last night. Men of the cave blow me away! What an honor it is to serve you. To all of the Team Man Cave warriors who set up and tear down the cave every Wednesday night a big thank you! You turn a gym into a hospital where God does heart transplants. I love you guys and have a passion filled week.

Dead men walking!

Many times I ask myself what makes a man fully alive? How much of a man’s day is filled with enthusiasm, joy, adventure and pursuing of his God given calling or passion? How many dreams have been shelved in the name of responsibility or he just too tired to think about it. I will never settle for the same old thing or succumb to being satisfied with the way things are. While I am alive I want to live everyday with expectancy and dream about what could be until I take my last breath. I want to be fully alive while I die daily!

Doing What You Love

Doing what you love! I believe passion is doing what you love. Passion is the one thing that God has called you to do that makes since to know one but you. It is the one thing that ignites the heart of every man and directs him on a journey of significance. Passion is not the sin of obsession for it cares more about the effect on others than its own personal fulfillment. Passion can be shelved, buried, displaced, ignored, and sadly forgotten but it can never be taking away or killed. What’s your passion? Find out at The Man Cave this Wednesday night.

Board Games

Board Games! My wife loves board games…I do not! Yesterday sandwiched between two wonderful football games was a board game. The name of the game was, “Sorry” and the game was older than well everyone but me. My desire was to get the game over quickly so I could be back to my football games! At the end of the day as I lay in bed God played back the two games. And then the question was asked, “Which game had more significance to your family the one you played together or the one you watched”? Be significant. Man Event in 2 days!

Write a Letter

Write a letter! I remember when there were no e mails, no cell phones, no PowerPoint’s, only four stations on the TV and the remote was your dad yelling at you to, “change the channel”. I can remember when you took the time to write a letter. There is something about one’s own handwriting that makes it personal and not so one dimensional. So in the next 24 hours write someone a letter or just a quick note. Emails are not a relationship!

Laughter

Permission to laugh! Someone once said,” The best part of your day is your first laugh”! I am grateful for the amount of laughter in the Zelesky home. The Bible says that, “laughter is good medicine” and we all could use a large dose daily. People take life way too seriously and of course there are those who don’t take life seriously enough. Today look for humor like you would a precious treasure. In the heartache of life there is buried humor! LOL

The Board Meeting

The board meeting! I am the first one to admit I do not do well in meetings. Last night I went to the annual board meeting and sat before the board of Sunset Christian Church. I was there to give a report on Man Cave Men’s Ministries. I went to share my heart but had no idea that I would experience men of great faith! The men who sat around the table blew my mind with the love and support I felt. I want to express my gratitude to the board and my dear friend Pastor Greg for allowing me to walk out my passion for guys! Thank you!

Bad Mood

Deal with it! I woke up in a really bad mood today. My brain was filled on the things I needed to get done and the tools I needed to get them done. Hey are there any guys dealing with too much to do and not enough time or recourse to get it done? My dad used to tell me, “I have champagne taste on a beer budget”! So I stop midstream and delighted myself in the Lord. I brainwashed my brain! I thanked God for what He has not what I think I need… You would like now!

I Choose It

Welcome to Cave Day! The wind is blowing on the outside but tonight the wind of the Holy Spirit will be blowing on the inside of The Man Cave! My wife just called to let me know that some of my fence just blew over. You gotta love life no matter what it brings your way. 10% of life is what happens to you 90% is how you choose to respond to the 10%. This will be a great day why? I choose it!

Heading Home

We are all heading home today after taking fun to another level in San Diego. Many pictures were taken and moments created as we simply enjoyed being with each other. Nicole, our daughter, is heading off to college out of state this fall so the nest will be somewhat empty. I am learning to run to what’s important and away from what is not! The Cave is coming in 2 days!!!

Invest in your family

The Zelesky family has been hanging out in our favorite town: San Diego, CA. Last night Nicole and I had a pillow fight (I won) and today we are taking a bike ride over to Coronado Island. Family time is the only time that you are investing in your legacy so invest well! We are all heading home tomorrow and then days away from the CAVE. Love you guys!

Family Zone

The most important thing! Sorry I missed my post yesterday but I am on a little get-a-way with my family. I loved yesterday! No phone, no laptop, and no thought of anything but time with the fam. Often you have to turn something off to turn something on. Declare to yourself the Family Zone in your home! Know when to stop working and pull out some board games and just hang out. We must live the cave at home!

The journey

God has a calling for every man! I was caught up in a moment of time last night as I saw several men coming forward for prayer. Their hearts' cry was simple but complex… what is the call of God on my life? It will become my life’s goal to see men built up not beat up, to live intentionally. It is one thing to know what your gifts, talents and abilities are, but it is another thing to know what’s YOUR CALLING--your passion. Stop letting your life define you and start allowing God to define your life! Welcome to the journey.

Why are you here?

What is your Passion? It is my passion that every man would discover and live his God given passion. Why in the world were you put on the planet and what is THE CALL of GOD on your life? Tonight at the Cave I will answer those questions through the life of the Apostle Paul. You are here for a reason! By the way, it is a specific calling…

Feelings or Faith?

Feelings or Faith? The reality of my faith is tested daily as I put my trust and hope in the hands of my heavenly Father. What I feel many times is not Gods reality but my own based on my limited knowledge of what is presently happening. During this fast your feelings will be tested… trust God He knows what’s coming!

When does God speak?

When does God speak? I believe God speaks when we are listening. There is much talk about God being silent however I believe many times it is the noise in our lives that drowns out the still small voice of God. During this time of fasting and prayer try to listen more than talk. Weird advice coming from me! Don’t miss The Wall today…noon at Sunset Christian!

The First Day of the Fast

Welcome to the first day of the churchwide 21-day fast! That’s right a fast! What does it mean to fast? Die to self in order to live at a higher level with God. Fasting allows you to truly think about what is important in your life. You will hear from God I promise you! So men of the Cave take the lead… no excuses! God will be for it, the devil will be against it! The Cave is just days away!!!

God's House

The church is God's house, not our house! I wonder sometimes if we have moved into a house that does not belong to us. Do I make Sundays more about my personal comfort, not God's? Do I worry about myself not being offended more than I worry about offending God? Maybe that’s why in Rev. 3:20 Jesus stands outside His own house and knocks! Have we moved Him out? Pastor Z

Pray With and For

Who do you pray with and for? I know it is a weird question but it tells a lot about your prayer life. I think the challenge for men if we are really honest is to pray with our family members and for our enemies. If the cave isn’t happening there it simply isn’t happening! The cave is more than a good old boys club!

The New Normal

WOW! The Cave was at capacity last night as men heard from one of the best! I want to thank my good friend Roger Crawford for sharing your heart and life with the men of the Cave. Corey and the worship band were better than ever as men raised their hands and hearts to the King of Kings and Lord of Lords. Special thanks go out to all the guys who set up and tore down the Cave. These are the best of times! BTW The Cave is the NEW NORMAL!

Wants and Needs

The older I get the more I want to make the choices that will cause me less stress. I hate drama as I guess most guys do. So why bring more to my life with another stupid choice? What I feel I want normally will bring great stress. I’ll try to stick with the needs! The CAVE TONIGHT AT 7:00pm

Passion and position

Your passion for life will change your position in life but your position in life seldom affects your passion for life! What is your passion? What ignites your life? What would you do if you never received a dime? The Cave is going to Rock this Wed.

Waking up

I love when my faith wakes me up not my fear. I rose early (3:50am) with the desire to take my time to another level. I want every moment to matter. I am going to work on keeping my ego in check today! I love the stillness of the morning. Man Cave in 2 days… I am so excited!

Priorities

I spent most of the day thinking how I can be more intentional and remind myself in 2010 what are my priorities? Man Cave is just 3 short days away… my heart is pounding!

Truth

Cherisse and I read the following line in our devotions last night, “The truth that makes men free is for the most part the truth that men do not want to hear”. I have often said that the truth will make you free but it will really make you mad first! What truth are you avoiding? The Z family is heading for the snow today. Good read for guys, "The Wedding” by Nicholas Sparks